'I was a mess. I was only fifty years old and I had deteriorating joints and bones. I was in the process of waiting many months for a knee replacement. I could barely walk and not drive. Even before that, I had spent a decade trying to manage the symptoms of painful rheumatoid arthritis amongst other things. My worst nightmare had come true. I was housebound, limited and nowhere to go except surrender to the realisation that the answer to all my problems was me. I was the centre of my nightmare but I came to understand that I am also the centre of my best dream!

As my entire life revolved around me, I reacted to it willingly (albeit unconsciously) and my reactions set off even more of the same or similar experiences. I did not realise then that how I reacted, thought, created and behaved carved out my reality. Like a sculptor chipping away at a large, beautiful piece of marble, every chip made a difference. I needed to see that I had to slow down my thinking and chip away with much greater care, confidence, skill, love, intuition and with all my being. I must add that it was not my ‘fault’ and I was not to ‘blame’. Blame and shame are simply unhelpful thoughts at any stage of life and about anything. If I knew better, I would have had different thoughts and made different choices. I still may have experienced some illness but with better care, support and professional help, I may have recovered much more quickly. For example, a deep belief of worthlessness can potentially lead to not being proactive, not standing up for yourself and not making progress in life.